


Please Smile

by Void (EroEmo)



Category: Pacific Rim (Movies)
Genre: Dealing With Loss, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Post-Movie: Pacific Rim: Uprising (2018), Pre-Relationship, all of characters in pru do actually, loss of friends, my girls deserve some hugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-30 16:54:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14501424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EroEmo/pseuds/Void
Summary: Vik tries to remain strong but it's hard when you know your friends are dead. Amara is there to help.





	Please Smile

The world was safe, it seemed.

People were cheering, happy that their beloved planet had been once again saved by the bunch of Jaegers and their pilots. Content knowing that no alien monsters would emerge from oceans anytime soon. Letting themselves feel relief.

Viktoriya couldn’t be like them.

As much as she wanted to feel joy and blissful lightness inside, she wasn’t able to. Because the crushing knowledge that her friends were dead wouldn’t let her. The awareness that, even though they had won, it wasn’t a bloodless victory. She didn’t know the exact number of casualties and she had no intention to. The death of Suresh and Ilya was more than enough.

That’s probably why, when everybody else went out to celebrate, she retreated to their quarters. She _felt_ joy and pride, upon winning in the end, but the more time was passing since the death of the Mega Kaiju, the more aware she was becoming about their _loss._ How they won’t hear Suresh laugh again, or how there won’t be any more sparring matches with Ilya. About the empty space that couldn’t be so easily filled again.

Just as she was about to jump into her bed, intending to either nap or read a book, someone addressed her:

“Aren’t you going with us?”

Viktoriya turned only to see Amara, standing in the doorframe. Curiously looking at her.

“Don’t want to be a killjoy,” she said, smiling bitterly.

Namani hummed, taking few steps into the room, still _staring_ at Vik. It was unnerving, in a way.

“You deserve to have fun, ya know? We all do.”

She wanted to say something, that maybe they deserved that but it didn’t mean they should party right away. Only few hours after their friends died a horrible death.

“You’re the hero of a day,” she said instead, turning away from her copilot. “Go and have your fun. I’ll take a nap.”

“Cadet Malikova taking a nap? That’s new,” Amara mused, closing the distance between them. Standing right next to Viktoriya, who now didn’t exactly had the capacity to deal with her. “Don’t tell me you’re _that_ worn out.”

“Namani,” she said, impatience clear in her voice. “Leave it alone.”

“Why?”

Vik gave her one of her best glares, the one that used to work on a younger girl when she just joined the program. Now, though, she was being given an equally intense gaze, not really challenging one, but not without a spiteful spark in it, either.

Namani’s eyes beamed with determination of sorts, sparks of curiosity playing in the blue of her irises. And then, it all melted into one, simple state: understanding.

“It’s about Guardian Bravo, isn’t it?”

Viktoriya felt an urge to look away but she fought it and won, not wanting to appear weak in front of Amara, of all people. She wasn’t weak and even if there were times when, even she, felt being crushed to the ground with everything around, no one would have to know. _Especially_ not Namani.

If she saw Vik’s eyes becoming a little bit watery, she said nothing.

“Do you think we are heartless?” Namani asked after a moment, her statement startling.

“What? No,” Viktoriya replied, giving her a baffled look. “It’s just…”

Somehow, she couldn’t bring herself to finish the sentence, words a shapeless mass in her head.

Amara grabbed her arm, gently and a bit shyly, as if steadying her, wordlessly saying _‘take your time’._

“I’m happy we won,” she eventually continued, biting on her lower lip. “But I can’t take them out of my head. Even if I went with you, I’d still be thinking how they’re not with us.”

The other girl nodded, squeezing Vik’s arm a bit tighter. Gesture not really comforting but nevertheless strangely appreciated and welcomed.

“Go, Amara,” Viktoriya said, looking Namani in the eyes. “You said it yourself, you deserve to have some fun.”

“Everyone does,” she answered, not letting Vik’s arm go. “Including you.”

“I’ve told you-”

“We are all sad,” Amara interrupted, her eyes glossy but voice surprisingly stable. “But I don’t think Suresh and Ilya would be glad to hear we are crying over them instead of celebrating. They would probably complain, telling us “ _come on, don’t give us that!”_ and “ _go and drink for us, for the another victory over those ugly kaiju asses”,_ don’t you think?”

The idea of them saying such blatant statements was, a tiny bit, hilarious. And so did Vik smile, even if it was barely visible.

“Maybe,” she admitted, feeling as her eyes water even more.

No, she wasn’t about to cry. Not right now and not in front of Amara. Nope, not happening.

“So? What do you say?” Namani smiled at her, something wistful in it, but hopeful, too.

“I say,” she started, taking Amara by her arm and pulling her into a surprise hug. “That you’re doing a horrible impression of Suresh.”

“And спасибо,” she added, this time quieter, as if afraid that somebody could hear her saying that.

Namani, although shocked, reciprocated the gesture, her arms tightly embracing Vik’s back. They stayed like that for few minutes, not saying anything, just being physically close. Viktoriya couldn’t remember when was the last time she had someone in such proximity outside training.

It was nice, to feel another person’s warmth, to know they cared for you.

And about that one Viktoriya was certain, the drift giving her enough insight. Even without it, there still were those small signs that, despite their obvious differences and fall outs, Amara cared. She also did, probably even more that she was ready to admit right now. That was an issue that should be addressed, yes. But maybe another time, preferably in another place as well.

Eventually she pulled out, tears mostly gone from her eyes — Namani’s too, it seemed.

“Come one, Jinhai’s going to be pissed that he has to wait for us so long,” she said, giving Vik a playful smile of hers.

“Jinhai is never pissed,” against her will, Viktoriya smiled too, letting herself be dragged outside the shared bedroom.

Her mind was still heavy with loss but now, somehow, she didn’t feel a lump in her throat or overbearing sadness in heart. Those feelings were still present, she was sure of it, but in a strange and unintelligible way, Amara lifted those up from her shoulders. Dividing them in half, between the two of them.

Viktoriya was never fond of sharing her burdens but maybe, this one time, she would do an exception.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm baffled that there is literally no Vik/Amara centric-ish fics out here and so I wrote this short fic, to try to fix that.
> 
> Thank you for reading!


End file.
